He was short with a big penis.
I shall preface this tale by telling you, amazing reader, that I am an impulsive being who will think of numerous stupid things to do if left alone.
So I was sitting in my dorm room one Friday night feeling especially lonely. I don’t think I had classes that day but spent the Friday as I normally spent Fridays, waking up late and in a daze, eating a massive amount of food in the dining hall, and then going on Omegle. As the sun was setting and the evening was turning into night, I began to feel restless. I was thinking wow I really want to do something reckless, so I did.
We exchanged selfies on Whisper.
Whisper is an app that I continually troll, but I continually go on, so I really brought this on myself.
I have to say that night I was dying for attention, specifically male attention, and I was determined to fulfill that desire.
I thought nothing of giving this guy my address, because really he did not know my address, he knew my residence hall address, that’s it. When I went downstairs to meet him, he was standing there, wearing flip-flops, sweats, and drinking a frappuchino. He was also, as I said, nearly half a foot shorter than me. Standing there, he was basically embodying all of the guys I disliked in high school.
When we got to my room, he showed me the weed. Oh YES, now I remember the original reason I invited him there, it was the weed. I posted that I wanted to smoke weed with someone (I at the time had never smoked weed), and he responded.
I told him I did not really want to do anything but smoke. Yet, I found myself letting him kiss me, letting him lead me to MY bed. As I lay there on my back, and he was hovering over me, I thought to myself wow, I really feel nothing.
At the time, I questioned whether I was asexual.
After that night, I really did feel asexual. The only thing that vaguely turned me on about the encounter was the thought that I was turning him on. Power turns me on. There, I said it.
So my Whisper friend proceeds to raise my legs up, suck my nipples, and I am still feeling nothing. Meanwhile he keeps asking me does that feel good.
After I finally told him I was not feeling it, whatsoever, and after I dismissed him, and only AFTER I was lying in my bed feeling stupid did I come to two realizations.
1. Always ask for a full body picture when exchanging pics with internet people you plan on meeting irl.